Wednesday, 8 July 2009

Voyeurism and dog biscuits (06)

Two Thirty. My plan of getting on a bus has not yet materialised. Instead, I stood opposite a shopping centre watching people cross the road.

Interestingly enough, I witnessed an adult male, approximately twenty five years old, cross the road, finishing with a running jump onto the opposite pavement.

I found this to be partially inspiring and admirable.




Soon afterwards I sat on the floor outside a supermarket, and contemplated sushi and the voyeuristic nature my behaviour had recently taken. I took a photo of a security camera above me to commemorate this mind set.

I received a heckle from a chav who wrongly accused me of taking his picture. I come to the conclusion that humans, especially when a camera is involved, are easily provoked and inherently narcissistic in wanting (not to be) the subject of the photo. A case of reverse (or perverse) psychology. An almost insurmountably feckless attribute.


I find myself in the dog biscuit section of a small food market. I'm not sure what I'm doing here, but I enjoy the graphics on the packaging and I imagine briefly what it would be like to exist as a dog biscuit, particularly a 'Jumbone' as I am fond of the name. This existential quandary was fleeting however, as I quickly realised that life as a dog biscuit, although filled with contentment and indifference, would actually contain neither, as my ontological interpretation simply supposed that dog biscuits have synapses and a limbic system. Instead a 'Jumbone' contains: 


Rice flour, glycerin, sugar, cellulose powder, wheat flour, propylene glycol, sodium caseinate, natural flavor, dried meat by-product, potassium sorbate, vitamin A supplement, niacin, riboflavin, pyridoxine hydrochloride, thiamine mononitrate, folic acid, dl-alpha tocopherol acetate, sodium tripolyphosphate, salt, calcium carbonate, potassium chloride, dicalcium phosphate, zinc oxide, and copper sulfate. 


None of these ingredients contain a nervous system of any kind.




I buy water and a banoffee muffin. I make my way to the bus stop. Wait. The bus arrives and I get on. I buy a day rider. Wait. Then I get off.


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